Chainsaws and cookies
by LoveTherapy
Summary: Once apon a time...Oh forget it, this is too boring. LETS GET REAL. INO GET YOUR CHAINSAW...IT JUST GOT PERSONAL! Enter a world where madness begins. -Dialoge- M rated just to be safe.


Ok so it's my first story, so please don't give me too many downers ok? Ok then... let the storymakin' BEGIN! 'Dialoge' characterss OOC at some parts. your a Karin lover...just to let you know she kinda dies in the story...so if you like Karin and give me bad reviews...FUCK OFF THIS IS MY STORY AND MY BRAIN! Thank you and enjoy.

Me-Why don't you tell the story, Sakura-chan?

Sakura-But the story is boooooring.

Me- *Crosses arms* Remember it's for the chilren.

Sakura-But it's like M rated, you know ''mature''

Me-Just read the damn story...it's a fairytale for goodness sake it's not close to being M rated.

Sakura-Whatever, fine...once upon a time in a far away kingdom...oh god forget it, this is too boring.

Me-Aww come on why don't you-

Naruto-Don't you fear...the hokage is here...DATTEBAYO!

Me-...

Sakura-...Oh noes.

Me-NARUTO YOU ASS, YOU DARE INTURUPT ME?!

Naruto-Well you see umm *cough* gotta go byyyeee!

Me- You little fox fucker get back here before I do somthing I'll regret!

Naruto-If you catch me you'll already do somthin' you'll regret!

Sakura-*Facepalm* Sasuke-kun, a little help here please?

Sasuke-I'm busy.

Sakura-Eating popcorn and chuckling while watching them argue is NOT being ''busy''

Sasuke-Hn

Sakura-Dont you DARE ''hn'' me.

Sasuke-Hn

Sakura-SASUKE UCHIHA!

Naruto-This is interesting.

Me-Indeed it is.

Neji-Well who's gonna tell the story? 'Cuz I gotta go like...wash my hair.

Everyone-...SURE you do

Naruto-*Cough* more like make out with Tenten *Cough*

Kiba-That was awful man...just awful.

Naruto-Its for the fans dude...for the fans.

Ino-Its scary how you guys are so much alike.

Kiba and Naruto-Thanks pig

Ino-WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!

Sakura-Do those boys know it was an insult?

Hinata-Apparently not.

Shikamaru-*yawn* Oh Hinata, your not stuttering.

Hinata-OH,OH,OH, JUST BECAUSE I STUTTER IN THE MANGA I HAVE TO STUTTER EVERYWHERE...I MEAN SERIOUSLY?!

Everyone-...sorry

Hinata-Whatever.

Naruto-Oh *Sniff* my beautiful Hinata, what *Sniff* what happened? I want you back.

Hinata-Ok...I mean, o-ok just f-for y-you my lov-ve...j-just for y-you.

Everyone-*Sweatdrop*

Lee-Embrace the power of YOUTHFULNESS!

Tenten-You just HAD to ruin the moment, didn't you?

Lee-Sorry youthful Tenten.

Tenten-Now go sit in the corner and think about your life.

Lee-*Turns chibi* But...*Sniff* the corner scary.

Girls-AWWWWWWWWW

Sakura-So KAWAII!

Tenten-The cutest in the world.

Hinata-Wow, he's just so damn cute.

Ino-Even I got to admit, he sure is cute.

Neji-Hey what about us?

Shikamau-Yeah you know...your boyfriends?

Naruto-Well except Kiba

Sasuke-Yeah we all know he's gonna die alone.

Kiba-*Sniff sniff* Fine...I'll just...*Sniff* get a cookie.

Me-HOW DARE YOU MAKE KIBA-KUN SAD?!

Naruto-Well it's true.

Me-Take it back or I'll kill all of you.

Sasuke-Ha you can't lay a finger on me.

Me-Who said I would do it phisicaly?

Sasuke-Wha?

Me-Kakashi please introduce our special guest

Kakashi-...*giggle*

Me-Put DOWN the damned porn and introduce the special guest.

Kakashi-...Oh...um right, our special guest is none other than...ITACHI UCHIHA!

Sasuke *Glare* you wouldn't.

Me-Watch me *takes script* A little of this. A change here and right there, and boom...behold, NEW dialoge. Here Sakura...read this.

Sakura-Ok *clears throat* Oh Itachi I love you so much more than that ass Sas-

Sasuke-STOP IT NOW!

Itachi-Shut up little brother, she's obviously confessing her true feelings towards me.

Sasuke-SHUT YOUR FACE!

Itachi-Is that phisicaly possible?

Sasuke-SAKURA NOOOOOO DON'T SAY IT!

Sakura-Where was I, oh yes...more than that ass Sasu-

Sasuke-*Grabs Sakura and kisses her*

Sakura-Sa-mmph-ke get-mpmh off

Sasuke-No way are you gonna say you love Itachi more than me.

Sakura-Well in a lot of fanfiction I actualy do love him more than you.

Sasuke-WHAT?!

Sakura-Yeah,I remember being in one fanfic where Itachi and I had s-...Sasuke where are you going?

Itachi-SAKURA HELP, SASUKE IS ABOUT TO KILL ME WITH HIS CHIDORI!

Sasuke-*Hides chidori behind back* No I'm not.

Sakura-Sasuke don't kill my hubby.

Sasuke-Hubby?

Sakura-Husband, you idiot.

Sasuke-Ohhhhh,wait HUSBAND...WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN?!

Ino-When the author changed the story.

Sasuke-*Glares a deathly glare at Natsumi*

Me-What I do?

Sasuke-What do you think? *evil glare*

Me-Get away you emo brat...It was Narutos idea.

Naruto-When did I come into this?

Sasuke-YOU LITTLE ASSHOLE!

Naruto-Trust me Sasuke-teme, it was NOT me.

Sasuke-Like I'll belive you.

Naruto-Why don't you just ask Sakura-chan?

Hinata-Wait, where is Sakura?

Tenten-She moved to Hawaiii with Itachi and had a baby named Hiroki.

Sasuke-*Faint*

Naruto-*Pokes Sasuke with stick*

Everyone else-WHAT?! O.O

Sakura-Hi everyone I'm back.

Hiroki-*Sleeping in Sakuras arms*

Itachi-Hey every-...kak...bleck...some...one HEEEEELLLLPPPPP!

Sakura-Sasuke stop choking Itachi.

Sasuke-What the hell, you had a baby with...with HIM?!

Sakura-We have good news.

Sasuke-Your ignoring meeeee!

Sakura-Hiroki...belongs to Lee and his girlfriend.

Everyone-...LEE HAS A GIRLFRIEND?!

Lee-...I have a girlfriend?

Sakura-Just kidding.

Everyone-Phew

Lee-Awww man.

Sakura-Hiroki is actually Sasuke-kuns child.

Sasuke-*Faints...again*

Everyone-O.O

Hinata-When-when did you guys...

Neji-Do the umm...

Naruto and lee-*Dies*

Kiba-Hey guys...what did I miss?

Karin-THAT SLUT SAKURA AND MY SASUKE-KUN HAD SEX, THE WORLD IS COMING TO AN END!

Kiba-*Faints*

Ino-When did the red headed bitch get here.

Karin-You wanna go blondie

Naruto-*Comes back to life*

Naruto and Ino-BLONDIE?!

Naruto-Ino get your chainsaw,it just got personal.

Ino-Damn right it did.

Karin-Umm help.

Sakura-Did you hear somthing?

Tenten-Nope.

Hinata-Not at all.

Neji-I thought I heard K-

Shikamaru-Shut it lord gayness

Neji-GAYNESS... .HELL.?

Shikamaru-I did what I had to do man.

Neji-Oh, and that included calling me GAY?!

Shikamaru-Your so troublesome.

Neji-Nuh-uh I so am not...besides isn't that your line for Ino?

Shikamaru-Where is Ino?

Ino-HAHAHA BITCH IS DEAD!

Naruto-NOW YOU WONT CALL US BLONDIES ANYMORE, IT'S OFFENSIVE TO...OUR KIND!

Karin-Someone *wheeze* help *sputter*

Sasuke-Go die in a hole bitch...you come between Sakura and I way too much.

Karin-But Sasuke-kun I'm dying.

Sasuke-Hn, not my problem.

Sakura-Hey Sasuke-kun when did you come back to life?

Me-Thats not in the script.

Kiba-Oh come on Natsumi-chan, I don't think anyone is following the script anymore...I mean look at me I was like dead a couple of minutes ago.

Me-But...*Looks at scipt*

Sakura and Sasuke-*Making out*

Me-Whatever I give up, just get on with your lifes *walks away*

Naruto-Oh Kami-sama, really guys?

Hinata-Yeah I feel like I just walked in on my parents doing the ''deed''

Neji-The ''deed''?

Ino-Oh come on you gotta know what the ''deed'' is.

Shikamaru-I mean you do it with Tenten every night.

Tenten- *Blushes* You really just HAD to say that?

Neji-Oh THAT ''deed''

Tenten-Shut the hell up Neji.

Neji-Wha'd I do. *chibi eyes*

Tenten- KAWAII! If you were in human form i'd rape you.

Neji-...IM HUMAN AGAIN, PLEASE RAPE ME!

Naruto-...dude, you've got issues.

Hinata-Don't we all?

Naruto-Not you my sweet hime, I love you.

Hinata-*Glomp*

Hinata and Naruto-*Making out*

Ino-*Shrugs* oh what the hell *graps Shikamaru*

Shikamaru-What the-

Ino and Shikamaru- *Making out*

Lee-*Comes back to life* THEIR PURNESS IS UNYOUTHFUL!

Kiba-I feel like a loner.

Shino-You can make out with me Kiba-kun.

Kiba-uhhhh O.O

Shino-*Gets closer*

Kiba-THE GAYNESS IT SURROUNDS MEEEE NOOOOO!

Sakura-Hey where's Tenten and Neji?

Ino-Im surprised your not dead from the loss of oxygen.

Sakura-Haha very funny but seriously where are they.

Tenten-Mmm Neji-kun it taste goooood. *Moan*

Naruto-Was that just-

Neji-Stop teasing, put it all in your mouth.

Tenten-BUT NEJI-KUN IT'S TOO BIG!

Ino-Too...big?

Hinata-Nii-san?

Sasuke-*Pout* how come he gets that and I don't?

Sakura-Have you forgotten about Hiroki...apparently you get ''it'' a lot.

Sasuke-Oh yeah.

Sakura-*Facepalm*

Hinata-*Uses byakugan* Oh THAT'S what their doing...it makes since, kinda.

Naruto-What...what are Tenten and Neji doing?

Hinata-You'll find out soon.

Naruto- *Whines* Don't be so secretative.

Hinata-Sorry sweetie.

Sakura-I have news about Hiroki.

Everyone-What?

Sakura-Drumroll please.

Ino-*Uses Karins dead head as drum*

Sakura-Hiroki...is not mine or Sasuke-kuns.

Sasuke-What do you mean.

Sakura-He's not ours I was just babysitting.

Sasuke-Boohoo *fake cries*

Sakura-You're happy aren't you?

Sasuke-Hn very.

Sakura-Just for that no sex for a week...no, three weeks.

Sasuke-No you can't do this to me!

Sakura-Watch me.

Sasuke-*Grabs Sakuras leg* Nooo please!

Sakura-Hehe *sweat drop* uhmm.

Kiba-Get off...Good boy.

Sasuke-Im no dog...unlike you.

Kiba-Shut the hell up and enjoy your ramen.

Sasuke-IM NOT NARUTO!

Naruto-Whats that supposed to mean?

Me-Hi *yawn* hey guys I'm tired and you guys can't continue with out me, so say byebye.

Everyone-...ok.

Naruto-BYE EVERYONE GOODNIGHT DONT LET THE RAMEN STEALERS BITE!

Sakura-You said that so wrong I don't even know where to begin...anyways, NIGHTY NIGHT MY PEOPLE SLEEP TIGHT!

Sasuke-Hn

Sakura-Sasuke *glare*

Sasuke- *Gulp* Sorry...Goodnight.

Sakura-Better.

Kiba-Bye my homies be safe and don't turn gay like Shino.

Shino-Oh Kiba-kun I still love you...goodnight to the world and embrace the power of love no matter what.

Lee-Thats right its the YOUTH...get it...get it...the youth...the ''truth''?

Kiba-HAHAHA...HAHAHA...No.

Hinata-Goodnight, sleep peacefully.

Ino-Bye my wonderful fans...muah...kisses to all.

Shikamaru-You guys are troublesome for reading this...peace out.

Choji-*Munch* Hey guys I just go here what did I miss?

Ino-Idiot.

Tenten-*Comes out bedroom eating chocolate bar*

Naruto-THAT'S what they were doing...makes enough since.

Neji-What did you think we were doing?

Sakura-Nothing at all...

Tenten-Bye and *bites chocolate* *moan* goodnight I love you all.

Neji-Not as much as me though, so back off losers. Bye.

Lee-Awww the youthful story is over *Sniff* GUY-SENSAI I NEED YOU!

Naruto-That was so gay.

Sasuke-Shut up dobe the story is ending.

Naruto-You wanna go Sasuke-teme huh?!

Me-Sakura...Hinata?

Sakura-Right.

Hinata-Our pleasure.

Hinata and Naruto- *Making out*

Sakura and Sasuke- *Making out*

Me-Thanks...um you can stop now...ok or you can keep goin' I'm cool with it...no, you no what QUIT THE TOUNGE RAPING ALREADY IT'S GIVING ME A HEADACE!

Sakura,Sasuke,Hinata and Naruto-Sorry

Me-Better...and Karin says bye from the underworld...GOODNIGHT PEOPLE WE ALL LOVE YOU!

Everyone-BYEEEEEEEEEE!

THE END

There ya go, my creation, my first story (or fart, whatever you think)...I'm thinkin' of doing another one...so review if you want another one. But you know what's weird...this was at first supposed to be a serious story called ''Mistakes'' but then this came out my brain during a sugar high so um yeah byyyyyyeeeeee!

-LoveTherapy


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